Hey, listen, dude. You’re thinking about this with the entirely wrong mindset.
Firstly, ‘being you’ doesn’t mean you get to be rude. Lots of people use stuff like ‘freedom of speech’ to get away with saying some pretty nasty stuff — not that I think you’re doing that, but you need to realize people get that all the time whenever they’re speaking out against something that offends them. Do you think that your ability to be as much of a jerk as you want is more important than how other people feel? They’re allowed to have standards for what they do and don’t want exposed to them, and they’re allowed to call you out if you’re kicking them around some. It’s basic respect, y’know? Everyone’s got buttons they don’t like being pushed and places that they don’t wanna go conversationally. That’s part of the reason why we have different kinds of relationships with different people.
Now if you’re looking for me to explain how the word ‘bitch’ is offensive, I can’t. Why? ‘cause it’s not offensive…not to me, at least. I don’t have anything against that word ‘cause I’ve never had it used against me, I’ve never had it oppress me, and I’ve never had it be used to diminish me or prevent me from being taken seriously. But just ‘cause it doesn’t offend you or me, doesn’t mean it doesn’t offend other people. The thing is, you don’t know where they’ve come from. You don’t know if that word has been used in that person’s past through sexist jokes; you don’t know if they’ve had someone close to them say it dismissively without considering what they might think of it. Sometimes, people have different quirks or things that bother them that you might not understand, and when you post language like that in a public space, you do risk one of those people at least stumbling upon your stuff and feeling hurt. It’s not their fault, either. Those words can have awful stigmas behind them, and some words that’re used carelessly in every day language can perpetuate stereotypes. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve seen people use the word ‘autistic’ without having any idea what it means.
Now, you’re always entitled to your own space. If you’re using that word with yourself, or with people you know are comfortable with it, then you shouldn’t have a problem, right? The fact that people are attacking you is tellin’ me that maybe you’re using it in front of people who specifically ask you not to use it. It can be annoying to have to monitor your language in front of other people, but try to have some courtesy, especially when a lot of people on Tumblr are going through difficult times and come here for comfort and safety. Topics like this are hot buttons ‘cause of how many people are hurt by them! Now, I don’t mean to say you aren’t allowed to say what you want, but instead to nudge you in the right direction of showing some understanding to other people, or at least trying to. And sometimes, you also have to accept there will be things about others that you may never understand. Everyone’s different and if we knew everything about everyone else, wouldn’t we be all the same?
I totally get that you want to express yourself, and you can! But maybe you can find other ways of doing it that aren’t derogatory and put other people down? Maybe you could try changing your language to convey basically the same thing, but with less offensive language. Listen to what other people say and consider your actions. I don’t think you’re a bad person, but you might be a bit too concerned with feeling alienated and not considering how you might change that. You’re the only person whose attitude is in your control, after all.
Honestly, there is always going to be someone that offended by whatever you say, both on Tumblr and in the real world. There is no way you can possibly get around that. In fact, I bet that there’s someone who has read up to only here of what I’ve written and is already offended by my words (if that’s you… um, hi?). Everybody is going to have at least one person on the face of this planet that, as much as they might like to be friends with everyone, can’t stand. For the sake of them both, it’s better that they just not be around each other.
Now I very rarely use words like “bitch” and other curse words myself and, personally, I’d be offended if such words were directed toward me. But I know that not everyone is me and isn’t going to act the same way. Your followers should be mature enough to understand this, and if they don’t like what you’re posting, there’s a reason why
exists, and they should use it, and move on. People are always going to rub others the wrong way. That is inevitable. (Protip: copy that image and use solely that to respond whenever someone says you a message about how much they hate your blog :P)
Now sometimes, people who like most of your blog, but not a few things will send you sincere messages about their concern. That is healthy, and can sometimes raise you to be aware of something that you had never considered. But when these become hostile and aggressive, and start coming from anons too …well, let’s just say there’s a reason why
exist, and you should be aware that you can toggle this, if they don’t relent.
I also encourage you to get into the habit of tagging posts with keywords. It’s very handy, especially for the people that, say, love a blogger’s art, but not their personal rants posts.
As Positive-Sonic mentioned, “everybody’s got buttons they don’t like being pushed”. If you tag the posts that contain this kind of language with something like …uh… “#tw: vulgar” (does that exist? *opens new tab to check* …yeah, it’s there), and you have a short message in your blog’s title mentioning that, then the onus is on them to use
and blacklist the tag on their end. If they don’t, then that’s their issue, because you’ve already warned them about it, when they followed you in the first place.
I personally think you should use less volatile language, but I’m almost certain you don’t care what I think you should be like, and I understand. If you came here to be yourself, then hopefully these will help reduce the backlash from these strangers you will never meet.